NEIL O. NELSON: Coronavirus has us tearing our hair out

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Posted: Friday, April 3, 2020 6:00 am

This shutdown ordered by the president, which has been extended another 27 days from today – Friday, April 3 – is getting old already.

For one, where’s a guy supposed to get a haircut?

The president has his own barber, I’m sure. I don’t. I swear, my hair is getting so long I’m starting to look like Trump, except my hair is gray and Trump’s is yellow.

The thing is, we both need a haircut.

Wonder why Trump is giving these afternoon press conferences? It gives him an hour away from Melania, that’s why.

Melania Trump would like to see the president’s afternoon coronavirus press conferences last two, three hours, what she tells friends, I’ve heard.

“Next thing you know, he’ll lock down Washington and the White House. His barber’s down in Mar-a-Lago. Oh my god, then what? THEY’LL WANT ME TO CUT HIS HAIR, that’s what.”

And here I never thought the president and I would ever have anything in common.

It’s obvious to me that we both need a haircut. And neither one of us want the wives to do the cutting, I’m betting.

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